Comments on: Always The Opposite Is Still One-Sided

By: lexybeast

lexybeast — Thu, 10 May 2007 19:09:22 +0000

I’m not totally one for lists… I think with a few exceptions, and with patience, most personality types can get along. (Otherwise few of those arranged marriages would work out.) What’s important in my view is bringing something new into each other’s lives and making a contribution to each other’s world view, personality, etc. The white-picket fence husband will grant security, but if that’s it, then what’s the point?

I’d argue that Cherise and I were much different before we met each other than the way we are now, and here are some very superficial examples. Without her, I may not enjoy Cadillac margaritas nor appreciate older cinema to the degree I do now (thanks to her cinephile family), not to mention that she’s introduced me to a lot of new sounds and music. And without me, she may have never seen Ravenous, perhaps this generation’s finest cannibal-vampire-horror-comedy film.

By: *e

*e — Wed, 09 May 2007 17:02:22 +0000

@chngthengteng: I agree. I’m a pretty complicated person. Cheers to you and Val.

By: chngthengteng

chngthengteng — Tue, 08 May 2007 19:18:06 +0000

your analysis is way too complicated for me… val and i felt a connection… in Taiwanese they say “en-tio” meaning a feeling of fate… we both felt that connection and fate. The circumstances implied this fate and well, that was good enough for us

By: *e

*e — Mon, 07 May 2007 22:04:38 +0000

It was great, wasn’t it, N? I also agree, Al & gen3ric. As with every relationship, it’s important to recognize there needs to be compromise on both ends. I guess that’s where the crossing off and revising comes in (including revising what you thought was “important” but have changed your mind since then). I tried to stress most importantly the need to continually evolve and grow as people together, and seeing the potential of doing that as a couple. Everyone is imperfect and we’d be lying if it would be the right thing to cross someone off our prospective list because he/she didn’t fit a list of trivial requirements. The post was spurred on mostly from an epiphany about one trait it would just be “nice” for him to have–a personal preference of mine. And he does.

By: Al Bolin

Al Bolin — Mon, 07 May 2007 21:56:53 +0000

Great post. I’m not 100% sold on needing to know what you want. Actually, it’s more like I’m not sold on having long list of desired traits for prospective partners.

By: gen3ric

gen3ric — Mon, 07 May 2007 21:48:55 +0000

I dunno, not that I speak from vast amounts of personal experience, but seems more like attributes that would make for a good fit, but not necessarily and actively looking for. Eh, who knows…different strokes for different folks.

By: twolims

twolims — Mon, 07 May 2007 19:56:21 +0000

Yes, you need to know what you want. People always laugh cause my husband and I are so different, but we get along so well. There are little things here and there in his personality that weren’t on my “list” but I’ve grown to love these little quirks that I thought would irk me.

He is my best friend. And he “gets” me. Nobody gets me like he does.

I really like this series by Pastor Erwin.