A past Question of the Day asks, “Are you a leader or a follower?” I guess the question intrigued me because as with so many, there are never any clean cut answers to this – just as asking this question in different scenarios will never yield the same answer. At the same time, let’s face it. No one wants to be a sheep, though no one can honestly say he or she loved Mussolini purely because he was a “leader.” I think the question touches upon a natural part of human psychology – can you name one person who would volunteer that he wished to be considered a follower?
Of course not. But it’s never so cut and dry as that, though, is it?
In reality, the question asks, “Are you set apart from the masses or are you just another member of them?” Also, “Do you dictate to others or are you dictated to?” – and if you are dictated to – God help you if your “dictator” is anything other than benevolent as you are, by nature, bent to the whim and whimsy of others.
I think we can all agree that no one is a leader all of the time. Or at least in the static sense of the word. That is, no one is domineering and controlling in all situations – one should hope. Without making a final judgment call on my own character, I know that the majority of what I want to say about myself (without that being the end result) I want to be consistent with, or even indicative of, my actions. “Leading by example” might be the closest way to describe my leadership style.
I’ll be honest. I find that people who talk about being a leader and how exactly to be a leader – just the mere act of the discussion on how the one best way to BE that one type of leader – annoy me to no end. It’s cliché. It assumes that there is:
- only one way to achieve the end goal of leading others, of inherently being ahead of them, and
- the ultimate end goal that everyone should have of controlling others, or of getting what *you* want.
As if there’s a self-help book out there that’s the end all and we’re to undermine any notion of individuality of our own. In the end, there’s tons of grey matter in the topic. There’s varying degrees of influence that each person carries in different areas. There are so many different, desirable qualities that fall under both leading and following (the latter of which should not be confused with weakness). Grace is a good thing. So is the act of listening. Besides, when people begin to sense that your main motivation is so that you – not the collective – benefit the most in the end, they lose trust in you. Ask yourself, how do you know when the goal is achieved? Is the end goal concrete or is it actually about notoriety, fame and the realization of the hunger for power?
And there I go – not answering the question. So am I a leader? I’d like to think I’m a leader in areas I’m suited to lead in. I don’t need to be designated as such to try and serve the best way I know how. I don’t need to make all the cues or even figure out the direction that is ultimately taken in the project to feel as if I’ve led a little. So no, I’m not a leader at all times but other, if not most, times I believe I am. No matter what my experience, I try and do the best I can, learn from it, speak up if I question or object, and improve the best way I know how.
5 Comments
I don’t really look at the question that way. Leaders and followers aren’t always about dictating or being dictated to. It’s can be about encouraging, helping, inspiring and doing.
Yes, there are many way to lead. Whether by love and respect or fear and intimidation, being a leader ultimately is about someone who makes the final decision, the final choice. Everyone else in the wake are those that follow suit.
Maybe I should answer this question as well.
i was thinking of that question and i think that i can be both. i find people who always wanna be the leader annoying and those who always wanna follow annoying, too.
@Edrei: Indeed. I was using the verb “dictate” to illustrate the most extreme definitions of either, I guess. Would you say, then, that there is only one leader? Or that if you weren’t the one person responsible for decision-making then you’re ultimately a follower? My argument is that there are many people on the fray that I would also consider leaders, who weren’t the most vocal but also inspired others and thus this, to me, makes them leaders. But they might not be the most visible and might just be accommodating or harmonious with the most vocal of the bunch.
@angelahappydot: Thanks for coming by! I know what you mean about people who are so obviously into being the frontman – either for the glory/credit of it or just satiating his/her need for power.
As for following, “Just form an original thought, Dwight.” – Michael Scott 
I like your answer. It’s a human one and reflects complexity of thought. Ironically it could be that the very people who accept that being your typical alpha leader is the best way to go are the sheep who didn’t think for themselves.
I used to get pissed off at this VW commercial that said “Drivers Wanted” because I didn’t identify with their portrayal “Drivers” and would say to myself, “Where the f*ck does that leave everyone else (the other 30% of kids whose lives aren’t enriched by sports)? What a myopic ad.”
@moet-chan: Thank you, woman.
I know, that VW slogan made me hesitant as well. But you know as well as I do that they need as much zing in those soundbites and slogans as possible.
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